Five Tips for Expressing Your Anger

OK, so you've heard that anger is a natural emotion, and that it's good to express it in a healthy way. Here are some tips to ensure that your expressions of anger are healthy ones:

1. Allow yourself to feel angry, but before you utter a word or take any action observe how you are feeling in your body, what you are feeling emotionally (that is, what feelings are under your anger) and what you are thinking.
2. Take responsibility for your contribution to the situation. Don't blame it all on the other person.
3. Avoid venting unproductively or ruminating about what triggered your anger. Doing either of these will only fuel your anger, causing it to intensify.
4. See if you can figure out a healthy resolution to the issue at hand. Ask yourself what needs to change in order for you to feel better. What specifically can you ask of the other person(s)? Remember, if you're not part of the solution, you're part of the problem.
5. When you arrive at a chosen response, consider the impact it may have on others and on your ongoing relationships with them.

If you believe that your response will be more helpful than harmful, then you're ready to speak or act. If not, you've got some more thinking to do before you respond!